In a large house, with 4 kids, we simply have a lot of stuff and lots of space and lots of chaos. Because of this, I try to set up some organizational boundaries around the house. One of them deals with what happens when the boys leave their stuff (toys, clothing, sports equipment, etc) out overnight.
Below is the contract that I drafted to ensure that we were all on the same page.
Confiscated!
Rule:
If you leave ANY of your items out in
the living room or family room or kitchen or front bathroom (common living
areas) – overnight or once you have left the house for the day (AM), then the
items have the potential to be confiscated.
Reason:
It is imperative that you learn to be
a person who is not a slob. A person who
knows how to respect other people’s living space, as well as your own. A person who knows how to take care of his own
possessions. A person who does not rely
on other’s to clean up after you. One
day, you will each be living on your own and you will be responsible for all of
the mess, so learn now how to pick up after yourself. Do NOT leave your clothes in the middle of
the floor for other people to trip on, walk over, or pick up.
Consequence:
Once it is confiscated, you will need
to do a chore to earn back each item (shoes and gloves count as one item). There is no negotiation here. YOU must learn to take care of your items …not
expect others to not follow through on the consequence.
Signatures:
By signing below, I UNDERSTAND the “Rules”,
“Reason” and “Consequences” of Confiscation.
Also, I agree to the terms and conditions described.
Parents
____________________________
Children
_______________________
As you can imagine, I
confiscated a lot of items and therefore, need to have a lot of “chores” on the
ready for my boys to complete to earn back their items. Some sample chores include:
·
Putting away the extra groceries
·
Wiping down door knobs and light switches
·
Vacuuming the hallway
·
Wiping down the handrail to the stairs
·
Cleaning out the truck
·
Picking up all the trash in the front and/or
backyard
·
Picking up their sister’s toys and putting them
away
·
Wiping down toilets, vanities or mirrors
·
Cleaning ceiling fan blades
·
Cleaning out the refrigerator
·
Sweeping the driveway and sidewalks
Also, I will only
keep the items for 2 weeks (although I originally considered only 1 week). After 2 weeks, all the items not earned back
are donated to Deseret Industries. However,
there are some items that I have confiscated that were expensive (like cleats)
or were paid for by grandma. Those items
I keep and the boys then enter into a sort of “forced” position of earning it
back. Of course, these items come with a
little lecture on taking care of their possessions, especially ones that others
have paid good money for them to have.
It’s not easy being a
parent. You have to be creative and
patient. But above all, you have to be
able to see the bigger picture. Keeping
your eye on the fact that you building stronger and more capable children – and
one day, adults – is the only way to get through all of the juggling and
organized chaos that is family life.
